Nothing brings out family drama like planning a wedding.
A bride has been called cruel and judgmental by her estranged parents after refusing to invite their “throuple” partner to her wedding—and then disinviting them altogether.
She described the drama that ensued in a post to the “r/AmITheA–hole” (AITA) subReddit, a forum for people to ask fellow Redditors whether they were in the wrong or right in a situation.
In her Reddit post, the bride wrote that she only invited her toxic parents as an act of goodwill at the behest of her grandparents, who raised her.
And that’s when things got complicated.
The woman has no real relationship with her parents, and she had no plans to invite them to her wedding.
The bride described her mom and dad as “‘free spirits’ that didn’t want to settle down and raise a child.”
After sending her to be raised by her grandparents, she would see them “every few months” when they’d stop by, but “eventually they stopped coming.”
Tellingly, the woman went on to say that she “didn’t miss them,” so they weren’t exactly top of mind when creating her planning her wedding guest list.
However, her grandfather asked her to let her mother be involved, so she ended up inviting her.
The bride then got a call from her father asking for a third invitation—which she assumed was for a sibling she didn’t know she had.
But after not having seen her parents in years, she found out the big news was that “apparently him and my mother have a man in his 30s that is a part of their relationship.”
The Redditor was quick to point out that neither she nor the groom are religious, and they have “no objections” to polyamorous relationships.
But, she went on to say, “I would prefer not to have to deal with that at my wedding.”
She quickly put her parents in place, telling them they “were invited as a courtesy and that they had no parental privileges for me to consider.”
Her father accused her of being bigoted toward polyamory—and it turns out her parents were planning to use her wedding to come out as polyamorous.
Her father claimed the bride’s refusal was “mean” and that he and her mother “wouldn’t have left me with my grandparents if he knew they were going to raise me to be prejudiced” against queer people.
Even worse, it turned out nobody, including the bride’s grandparents, were aware of her parents’ “throuple.”
She wrote, “it seems that they were going to use my wedding to introduce this guy to the families.”
As a result, the bride not only disinvited her parents but spoke with her wedding planner and the manager of the hotel holding her reception to ensure her parents would be escorted off the premises—by police if necessary.
Once word got out, it was an all-out war with members of her family trying to advocate for her parents, and her mother “screamed at me for telling people her private business.”
Which is a pretty rich accusation considering she was planning to use the wedding as a coming-out party.
As you might guess, the vast majority of Redditors thought the bride’s parents were way out of line.
Most agreed they were “lucky they’re getting an invite at all,” as one put it.
And given all the drama, one Redditor wondered if the third partner “even knows they have a kid” in the first place.
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Like many others, they went on to say, “be poly, no problem! But stop trying to bring along randos when you yourself have a tenuous relationship at best.”
Others were shocked by the parents’ seeming hypocrisy.
They pointed out that they didn’t want the bride “airing their private business” even as they were “planning to overshadow your wedding.”
In the end, it’s hard not to feel like the bride dodged a bullet by being raised by her grandparents.
As one Redditor wrote, “Thank goodness they didn’t raise you, at least they had sense enough to leave you in wonderful hands.”
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice and human interest topics.