The Internet is slamming a man for returning a wedding dress his partner paid for, garnering harsh criticism over his actions.
The now-viral post with 11,500 upvotes is titled, “AITA for going off on my soon-to-be husband for returning my wedding dress,” and it was shared to the subreddit “Am I the A**hole” on May 26. Redditor @Sealine5033, a 29-year-old female, and her fiancé, a 33-year-old male, are soon to be married.
According to The Knot’s Real Weddings Study of 15,000 couples who were married in 2021, the average cost of a wedding dress was $1,800. In addition, 99 percent who identified as female revealed they wore a dress for their wedding.
The Internet is backing a woman’s response to her fiancé returning her wedding dress. Here, a bride in a wedding dress looks down while seated on stone steps.
“Wedding planning has so far been going alright except for [a] few things he and I argued about like the venue and flower girl,” the OP revealed. “Now we’ve been arguing about my wedding dress.”
The woman revealed that since she was young, she has dreamt of having her “own beautiful wedding dress.” She can afford it, but her fiancé thinks it isn’t alright to “waste” a couple thousand on a dress she will only wear once.
The OP admitted that he could have a point, but, she responded by telling him she’s paying a “typical” price for a wedding dress. And in her opinion, it’s a “once in a lifetime thing, then why not make sure it’s special?”
But the woman’s fiancé wasn’t totally “convinced,” and he made a suggestion that she rent a wedding dress instead of outright buying one. He said that she was being “irresponsible with money” and he mentioned how much cash she’d already set aside “to ‘rent a face’ (he means makeup) and wear ‘fake’ hair (he means extensions).”
However, the OP has a “vision” of what she wants to look like on her wedding day, and she believes that it’s her “right” as the bride. She ended up buying her wedding dress, but just a day later, she realized it was missing from the closet.
“I freaked out,” the OP said, ‘but he told me he returned it and got the money back. I was shocked, I asked him why he did that, and he said he thought the dress was ridiculously expensive and that was wasting money and again suggested I go rent one.”
Things didn’t end there, though. The woman admitted she “blew up and went off” on her fiancé, which she hasn’t done before. He even took some steps back and told her to “calm down.” She told him he didn’t have the right as she was the one paying for the dress.
“He got upset and said that there’s no ‘I’m paying for it myself’ in marriage and that my attitude is setting the tone for what type of dynamic we’ll have in our marriage,” she went on. “He kept on about how I must expect him to pay for everything while I keep ‘my money’ or spend it irresponsibly (but I never tell him how to spend his money). I responded that he gets zero say in how I spend my money whatsoever.”
The woman’s partner told her that she should “grow the f**k up” and cease with the “dream wedding dress cliché.”
She said he walked off and called his mother who also got involved, chewing the OP out, adding that she wouldn’t let her ruin her son’s “financial stability” with her dealings with money. She also advised the OP to rent a dress or get a cheaper one and continue on, but the Redditor “declined.”
When it comes to the couple’s finances, they have an agreement they are separate with “consideration of joining them” within a year or two of marriage and when her partner has settled on his new job. However, her partner said if the OP keeps it up, he’ll “reconsider” that.
In another comment, the woman revealed, “money has never been an issue.” However, she has no clue why he “keeps stressing out” over it. He wants to spend less, even on other things not related to the wedding. He even cut back on eating out and “monthly purchases like electronics and furniture, which to me sounds excessive. What bothers me more about it is that he does this with his and my money.”
She also added that her fiancé still has the money from the dress, and he said he would give it back to her once they come to a solution.
Redditor Reactions: A ‘Red Flag’ Wedding
Over 4,000 comments came in over the viral situation, and people are fully supporting the woman while bashing her husband for returning her dress.
A Redditor thinks the woman should call the authorities on the man “who stole several thousand dollars from her instead of marrying him, but that’s just me,” adding that the theme of the wedding is “red flags.”
The bridesmaids will wear red,” they said. “The groom will have a red suit. And the aisle will be lined with increasingly big red flags until she reaches the altar which is actually just a tent made of one giant red flag.
“The bridesmaids will wear red,” they said. “The groom will have a red suit. And the aisle will be lined with increasingly big red flags until she reaches the altar which is actually just a tent made of one giant red flag.”
Another user thinks the OP is not at fault, adding they don’t even care if the dress was $10 billion, a person doesn’t return a bride’s wedding dress without talking about it first.
“And last I checked, your mother-in-law isn’t your accountant and should have 0 say over how you spend your money,” they added. “If your fiancé wants to discuss budget issues as a couple, that’s great! That’s the fine and responsible thing to do. Him throwing a temper tantrum and then crying to mom is not that.”
Some people were straight-up calling for the woman to leave her future husband over the stunt. “NTA [not the a**hole], dump his a**,” a Redditor said. “He’s going to want to control everything once you’re married, including what you do with your money. Run far away from this mess, or you’ll regret it later.”
Another added, “NTA, he’s incredibly controlling and dismissive of your opinions. It’s your money and an incredibly special day. I would not marry someone who disrespected me this way and you shouldn’t either.”
Someone is certainly setting the tone for what this marriage is going to be like, and if I were you, I’d be running in the opposite direction from all those red flags he’s waving.
One Redditor said they would ensure, if they were in the woman’s shoes, the man can’t access her financial information, insisting, “NTA. Someone is certainly setting the tone for what this marriage is going to be like, and if I were you, I’d be running in the opposite direction from all those red flags he’s waving.”
Some users even labeled the situation as financial abuse, and one such user called the woman “crazy” if she married the man.
“This is just the start of his financial abuse,” they said. “The fact he’s held on to your money is mind-boggling. Lots and lots of red flags here sweetie. Coming to an agreement means giving in to what he wants. This is your future, so beware.”
Newsweek reached out to Redditor @Sealine5033 for comment.
This isn’t the only viral moment involving weddings.
A groom was bashed for doing the one thing the bride told him not to on their wedding day.
A bride was backed for refusing to cancel her wedding over her sister-in-law’s divorce.
In addition, a bride barred her sister-in-law from her wedding for being too pretty.