A man has been widely praised for dumping his girlfriend, following an argument over her choice of outfit for a wedding.
A newly-single man posted the dilemma to Reddit’s popular Am I the A**hole forum, under username Mallvar, where it’s amassed more than 18,000 upvotes since being shared on Monday, and can be read here.
In it he explained he’d been invited to a colleague’s wedding, and as he had a plus-one decided to bring his girlfriend of one year.
But when he went to pick her up, he claimed she was wearing an “inappropriate” dress.
He said: “She’s also wearing an off-white dress that was rather ornate. As she got in I told her that she looked stunning, but I asked if she could change to a different colored dress for the ceremony.
“I’m not one for etiquette by far, but one of the few things I have heard everywhere is that you should not wear a white dress to a wedding unless you’re the bride. She became pretty upset and wanted to know what was wrong with her dress.
“I said that it would be inappropriate to wear a white or off-white dress unless you’re the bride—and that it’s like wedding-law or something, trying to be lighthearted about it.
“She rolled her eyes and said that it was an outdated tradition about women and virginity and that when her friends got married everyone wore white and that it’s not a big thing anymore.”
Mullvar isn’t wrong, as wearing white when you’re not the bride is possibly the biggest faux pas guests can make.
Bridal consultant, LauraLee Baird, told website Brides.com: “Although many traditions are getting reinvented or excluded altogether, a constant is the bride is the only person at her wedding who is allowed to wear white.
“Some of these events have friends and family of the groom who might not have been able to meet the bride yet and could lead to some confusion.”
Things escalated into an argument in the car, as they sat on her drive, with the man continuing: “I told her that I don’t know what the dress code is for this ceremony, but since it’s not saying “all white clothes” I still thought she should change to another color but white or “almost-white”—because my colleague was getting married and we had no idea how she felt about it.
“My gf became really upset and told me that I was trying to control what she was wearing and that it was abusive, which honestly made me really upset and hurt.”
He swore, she cried and called him “abusive,” and the man declined a hug and told her to get out the car. He drove off and went to the wedding, turning off his phone after responding “I don’t want to talk right now” after she sent numerous texts.
He later said: “The bride was the only one that was wearing white so I feel as if my gut feeling was the right one.
“When I got home my phone had blown up by texts from her and her best friend saying that I was being inconsiderate and controlling and should apologize for my behavior.”
After venting to some friends, most agreed but some felt he shouldn’t have tried to tell his girlfriend what to wear.
But he stuck to his guns, saying: “I feel as if I was in the right since it was my colleagues wedding and it was better to be safe than sorry.”
After the post blew up, Mallvar added an update, confirming he broke up with his girlfriend after their heated argument.
They chatted on the phone, but things soon soured, as he wrote: “She asked if she could come over, and I said no and that it would be best for us to go our separate ways. She got upset and asked why I wouldn’t even try to work it out.
“I basically just said goodbye and then she said my d*** was small which actually made me laugh after what had been a pretty mature conversation and then she hung up.”
He thought her calling him “abusive” after their very first argument was a step too far, and after that comment it was best to end the relationship.
Most Redditors agreed with him, and the fact you should never wear anything resembling white to a wedding.
Mother_of_Dogs3 thought: “NTA. Your GF should have known better. Unless you KNOW the couple and they have no issue or it’s a request, you don’t wear white. She also overreacted and you did the right thing by asking her to not go and to get out of your car.”
Tiablolu wrote: “She overreacted because she 100% KNEW the rule.”
Wordsmythy commented: “She wasn’t even invited, she’s the plus-one of OP, who didn’t want to potentially ruin the wedding day of a colleague. EVERYONE knows not to wear white to a wedding. This chick intended to upstage the bride. NTA. I’m glad OP told her to get the f outa the car.”
Knittnens added: “Yeahhh it really gives the ick when she calls him an abuser for asking her to respect the bride at her wedding… It kind of undermines the struggles that actual abuse victims go through. NTA OP I’m sorry she said that to you that must have felt awful.”
Newsweek reached out to Mallvar for comment.
File photo of a wedding guest. A man dumped his girlfriend after a row over her “inappropriate” wedding guest outfit.
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