MONTHS before her wedding, a bride confronted her bridesmaid about her “unkempt” hair – knowing it was due to a chronic health condition.
When she turned to the internet for a second opinion, the bride was slammed for being “selfish” and lacking empathy.
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A bride-to-be shocked commenters with a ‘selfish’ request she madeCredit: Getty
The bride-to-be posted in Reddit’s Am I the A**hole forum, and her question was so outrageous, it was also reposted to the Wedding Shaming subreddit.
She asked the commenters if she was being unreasonable for asking her bridesmaid to undergo a psoriasis scalp treatment prior to her wedding.
“Aubrey has heavy psoriasis and is self-conscious about it,” the bride explained. “In recent months, it’s developed on her scalp.”
Bridesmaid Aubrey had access to a special shampoo that loosened the “plaque-like flakes” on her scalp, but the treatment was extremely painful.
To compensate when she wasn’t able to use the shampoo and conditioner, Aubrey would wear hats and hoodies instead.
“I wouldn’t have minded her wearing a short sleeve dress and showing her flakes/plaque on her arms and legs as it’s really not an issue,” the bride-to-be wrote.
But Aubrey’s scalp is a different story.
“Because you can’t see the redness, just the flakes, her hair looks unkempt often,” the bride wrote.
“It’s her hair, so I don’t care on every other day,” she added, “except my wedding.”
The bride spoke to a hairstylist who specialized in scalp psoriasis and was willing to do the treatment the day before the wedding.
It would still hurt, the bride admitted, but may be more gentle if done by a professional, and Aubrey would have a day to heal.
But Aubrey didn’t agree with the bride’s “reasonable” request. In fact, she was crushed.
“She got really upset and said I’m not a true friend if I can’t accept her as is,” the bride wrote. “She’s now not returning my calls or texts.”
Commenters on both forums slammed the bride, and said she got the exact response she deserved.
“I have psoriasis, on my scalp even. It hurts like heck,” wrote one commenter.
“She can’t control where it develops and how badly. She’s already self-conscious,” they continued. “Why not just kick her a little more while she’s down?”
Another lambasted the bride, writing, “You’re not asking for her sake, you’re asking for aesthetics.”
Others added that psoriasis is often triggered by stress – so the bride’s request might even worsen Aubrey’s condition.
Many people, including former brides, questioned why an intense medical treatment was the bride’s first suggestion.
“You should have offered to let her wear a fancy hat to go with her dress,” one person wrote.
Then they took the idea a step further. “Heck, get hats for all of your bridesmaids, they’ll all look amazing in them and you’ll have very unique photos.”
“The bride should stop focusing on this like it’s going to ruin her wedding,” said one commenter, who was confident most people wouldn’t notice Aubrey’s hair.
Some people recommended photoshopping any evidence of psoriasis in photos, but the bride pushed back.
“The photographer said it’s not something she can fix in editing,” the bride wrote in a comment. Others were skeptical.
“Either she’s lying or her photographer isn’t talented,” one commenter wrote.
Someone else had an inspired suggestion in response. “Photoshop the entire bride out of this wedding,” they wrote.
