Being asked to be in a friend’s wedding party is usually a huge honor. You mean so much to them that they can’t imagine celebrating the most exciting day of their life without you being an integral part of it. But while being a bridesmaid or groomsman often leads to cherished memories, it also has the potential to become a nightmare if your friend who’s tying the knot gets a little too power hungry. Below, you’ll find the story of how one group of bridesmaids decided to abandon their friend’s wedding altogether after the she had a major meltdown over glasses.
The wedding party’s job is to help the bride and groom’s day go off without a hitch
Image credits: Andre Hunter (not the actual photo)
But after this woman threatened to kick one of her bridesmaids out for wearing glasses, the rest of the bridal party decided to take a stand
Image credits: Oliver Li (not the actual photo)
Image credits: plogan56
Image credits: Kate photo (not the actual photo)
“Jemma walking out, not only of a wedding but also a toxic friendship, was so satisfying and inspiring”
We reached out to the bridesmaid’s friend, Plogan56 on Reddit, and he was kind enough to have a chat with us about why he shared this story in the first place. “I shared it because Jemma walking out, not only of a wedding but also a toxic friendship, was so satisfying and somewhat inspiring,” the friend told Bored Panda. “She and the rest of their group weren’t putting up with bridezilla anymore,” he added, noting that ‘Jemma’ is a fake name used for the purposes of this story.
We were also curious if there had been any updates on the situation and if there had been any contact between the bride and the bridal party. “As far as I know, no, none of them have contacted the bride,” the friend shared. “The bride has tried reaching out to them to apologize, but I think they’re not gonna forgive her due to past transgressions.” And as far as why people sometimes feel entitled to treat their wedding parties poorly, this Redditor says that he doesn’t know this bridezilla well, “However I think [she] was on a power trip, as her sudden disdain for glasses came out of nowhere on the day of the wedding.”
Plogan56 also shared his thoughts on how controlling a bride and groom should be when it comes to their wedding party, noting that they’ve been to and in several weddings before. “My family likes simple, inexpensive weddings, so nothing major,” he noted. “I’d say setting a dress code and limiting guests (mostly toxic family or trouble makers) should be what [the bride and groom] control for the most part, but not barring people because they need things like glasses, wheelchairs, hearing aids, or anything else they might need to function.” And as for what would make this friend leave a wedding altogether, he said that “a control freak moment from the bride or groom, the bride or groom insulting me throughout the wedding, or them making sudden and unreasonable demands at the last minute” would do the trick.
Image credits: Al Elmes (not the actual photo)
A couple’s wedding day should be all about them, but that doesn’t mean they can steamroll their friends and make unreasonable demands
Being a bridesmaid or a groomsman can be extremely exciting. The biggest priority is supporting your close friend as they enter this new stage in their life, but the role does not come without responsibilities. Along with agreeing to wear a specific outfit on the big day, the wedding party might be responsible for planning the bridal shower, planning the bachelor/bachelorette party, attending bridal appointments, and making sure the big day runs smoothly. It can be a great honor to be part of a friend’s wedding party, but these roles should also not be taken lightly.
While most wedding guests can attend a reception with no concerns except enjoying a delicious meal, having free drinks, dancing the night away with their newly wedding friends and snagging a slice of scrumptious cake, bridesmaids and groomsmen, on the other hand, have a few jobs on their plates. After the ceremony has concluded, there may still be speeches or toasts to give, and if the bride needs help going to the bathroom with an extravagant dress, her bridesmaids will have to be on call. Most of us are happy to do whatever it takes to ensure our loved ones have a magical wedding day, but we take on these responsibilities with the understanding that the bride and groom are important people within our lives.
The bridesmaids in any given wedding should be the closest friends a bride has, so it’s expected for her to treat them with respect and kindness the whole way. It’s understandable for brides to become overwhelmed leading up to their big day, but the stress of wedding planning is not an excuse for treating friends poorly. Today’s Bride has some tips on how to keep your wedding party happy, and they recommend not overscheduling them, going easy on their wallets, planning fun non-wedding outings or events for them to enjoy, letting them help and showing appreciation. Bridesmaids want to support their friends without being taken advantage of, so they should never be expected to agree to anything that makes them uncomfortable or requires them to spend exorbitant amounts of money.
Image credits: Anastasia Kravtsova (not the actual photo)
It’s never worth it to lose a friendship over such a petty dispute
Weddings are to be enjoyed by everyone, including the guests and wedding party. But if you’re a bridesmaid who has noticed your friend verging on ‘bridezilla’ territory, here’s some advice from Vows and Forever on how to handle her. It’s recommended to do your best to listen to a frustrated bride friend and hear her out, but don’t enable her. Don’t add fuel to the fire, and if possible, add positivity instead. It’s understandable for a bride to have an outburst or two, but if it comes to the point where you need to keep your distance from the bride, go ahead. Supporting her special day should not come at the expense of your mental health or wellbeing.
Ultimately, a wedding is only one day, and it’s not worth ruining an entire friendship over. If you’re a bride who’s extremely particular, consider how important it is to you to have your friends by your side before having a meltdown over flowers or shoes or glasses. We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Have you ever been in the wedding party of a friend who started to lose their cool around the big day? How did you manage to preserve the relationship? And if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda article featuring a bride who made unusual and unreasonable requests, look no further than right here.