A groom has confronted his mother over what he calls her “childish, petty” and “immature behaviour” in the leadup to his wedding.
He shares on Reddit’s ‘Am I The Asshole’ thread: “My fiancée and I are getting married Halloween night this year. We both love Halloween and everything about it.”
He says despite choosing Halloween as their date, they aren’t having a costume wedding but have chosen a “moody, autumnal, and sort of bohemian” theme.
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The couple are planning to marry on Halloween evening. (Getty)
The groom says anytime he and his bride-to-be discuss their theme, people give their opinions, often suggesting a “Victorian wedding” or a “vampire-themed wedding”.
“Those opinions were fine and all, but my fiancée has finally purchased a dress that she loves,” he explains.
“Frankly, it annoys me to constantly hear people tell my fiancée what she should have picked.”
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The groom has taken to Reddit to share his frustration. (Reddit)
He says his mother is the “greatest offender” in this regard, and it all came to a head recently when she brought up the subject again.
“At lunch, she blatantly said, ‘You know the dress I would have picked?’ I paused for a moment and took a deep breath before saying, ‘Look, I love you to death, but I’m so sick of hearing what other people would do, and what she should do. She already bought her dress, and nobody has said anything except how they’d do it better.'”
He says he thought his response was “reasonable” but his mother obviously didn’t agree, responding, “Okay, but don’t expect me to show any interest anymore.”
‘Frankly, it annoys me to constantly hear people tell fiancée what she should have picked.’ (Getty)
The groom was “baffled” by the response, which caused him to react “a bit aggressively” before leaving the lunch feeling annoyed.
“My mum then FaceTimed me later that night to tell me how badly I hurt her feelings and how ungrateful I sounded, and how badly I owe her an apology,” he says.
“I did not apologise, and instead told her that her ultimatum was childish, petty, and immature. I told her if anyone needed to apologise it was her.”
“She kept telling me that I need to just nod my head and move on when someone annoys me and that I am the reason conflict happens,” he continues, before asking the forum: “Am I wrong for saying what I said? I’m so annoyed that nobody, especially my mom, has said one good thing about my fiancé’s dress and instead uses it as an opportunity to tell her how they would do it.”
His mother has taken issue with how he responded to her comment. (Getty Images/iStockphoto)
Many commenters have taken his side in the matter, one writing: “I would have told that if she’s not happy with the decisions, she could just not come to the wedding.”
“Sounds like one of these mums who only feels heard and included as long as you let her slam all your choices,” adds another.
“Mum needs to take her own advice to just nod her head & move on with being annoyed about the wedding dress selection,” another commenter suggests.
Most people agree he shouldn’t have to apologise.
“You are right, she was being immature and you do not need to apologise for anything. It was inappropriate of her to offer comment when your fiancée has already bought the dress. It is her that owes the apology. Is she like this with other matters?” one explains.
Another agrees, but suggests a more diplomatic approach.
“I think you held your boundary in a very reasonable way. She can either honor your boundary, or you can again refuse to listen to her unsolicited, unsupportive opinions.”
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