Zambian Author Relives Memories of Wedding She Cancelled 10 Years Ago, 3 Months Before D-Day

  • Mutumwa Lubasi would be celebrating her 10th wedding anniversary this month if the event was not cancelled three days prior
  • It was a period that she says left her heartbroken, but she picked valuable lessons about love, life, and the need to set standards
  • She explained that she may have been young and naive 10 years ago but could see through the turbulent marriage that lay in wait for her

Nalukui Mutumwa Lubasi, a Zambian author, speaker, and blogger, has taken a journey back in time to a period she came close to getting married.

Lubasi would have hit 10 years in marriage this month if she didn’t walk cancel the wedding. Photos: Mutumwa Lubasi.
Source: Facebook

She disclosed that the anticipated big day did not happen as the wedding was cancelled three months before it happened.

Lubasi, however, did not delve into the details of what led to the collapse of what seemed like a done deal.

In a throwback post on social media, the public figure shared an old photo of herself trying out a wedding dress 10 years ago.

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“Young and naive but I still knew that love is not for suffering,” she wrote, sentiments that point to possible mistreatment from the man she was almost getting married to.

She added that life always hands humans unexpected challenges that leave a lot of trauma, from breakups, divorce, betrayal in love, to unmet expectations.

Lubasi says that unpacking these curveballs can cause a lot of self-doubt on those who are affected.

Lessons learnt

As much as it was a painful experience and the journey of healing was not easy, Lubasi says it came with a host of lessons.

The first, she explained, is that one is not responsible for how people treat them but how they respond.

“You are responsible for setting standards and having boundaries so that you know when someone is crossing the line,” she continued.

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Lubasi’s other lesson is that life is not perfect and no one is perfect but it is wrong to become the subject of suffering in order to be loved, understood, appreciated, and treated like a queen.

This, she continues, can only be achieved when one knows their value, believe it, and act like it as it aligns them with people who agree and act like it.

“Never give up on yourself,” she concluded.

Kayley Stead stood up on wedding day

While Lubasi noticed something about her man was not right and walked out before it was too late, Kayley Stead missed out on the red signs.

That is she ended up walking down the aisle alone after he would-be groom failed to show up on the wedding day.

The man’s unpopular decision was, however, not enough to dim the sparkle on her plans to have a wonderful day as she had speeches, an evening party, and a photoshoot.

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Stead disclosed that the event had consumed all her life savings and she wasn’t going to let it go to waste.

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